Time is passing .... (from blog post on Tribe)

the heart and mind are trying to heal and process, but there are moments in time when I think of my Father gone that it is just not real.

It is coming up on a month now since he passed so quietly and unexpectedly at home. It seems from the moment I arrived at the house, it was like I became my Father's keeper. Okay, that is odd sounding but let me explain.

Of course my Mother tended to his medical needs in getting help there to try to resuscitate him, but once I arrived it was me who organized what and when things were going

start happening when it came to Dad's spiritual home.
Contacting the proper place to get Him. I organized the appointment in order to make the decisions on what was going to happen with Him and making sure that proper things were in place for Him and my Mother's needs. And - when it came time to pick Him up, it was me - getting the opportunity to share our last Father/Daughter time together. Now, it seems that when it comes time to take Him to his final resting place, I again will be tending to Him, per my Mother's request.

Now, I do have a brother, who was there through part of this process, but it has been left to me to handle these things. Don't know if it has anything to do with being the oldest, or a "woman" or or or what....
It just is what it is...
The last month has been a blur in so many ways, with all the things that have to happen and need to happen...so as the day is approaching that Dad will be placed in his niche' the reality of it is really hitting home.

So much to still do for Mom but that day will finalize the reality of his death...I am not looking forward to this at all, bu I will do what I must - to honor Him and His memory as best I can...for I am His keeper.

Even in silly hats and playing a Satyr...I was the one there with them...keeping them happy and safe.